I am disliking things a lot. I am hardly doing meditation. Yesterday it was a sad and sleepy day. As I took Amitriptyline the night before, I felt sleepy the whole day. I gave calm and good presentation for Big data. I don’t know how Veena doesn’t seem to have received my mail. It was good partnering with Kriti. Later the comedy class and the namesake presentation in Business using Cloud. I slept afterwards on an unending sleep. I was woken up by the call from some company. I felt guilty the way I responded like I had no confidence and I started to feel bitter about it. This was the initiation of my depression. I spiraled down into one more dark valley.
I was there but I was not there in SPLE class. Varman’s classes are valuable if only we gave a shit. I feel low, drastically low. I am afraid I may not make it to RB. Why do I even think like that? I ate well at CCD. I was wasting time on Youtube. My shampoo bath has caused me one more sinus attack. I feel so tired, cold and depressed. I am not able to call mom. Dad calls but I hardly answer it properly. Naveen called but I couldn’t pick up. I have studied a bit from the placement notes. I feel so bad I couldn’t even write. I wanna write no more. I just wanna do nothing. Even doing nothing is an agony.